I envy people who drink – at least they know what to blame everything on
Oscar Levant

Fejiro Oliver

If anyone in Nigeria still thinks we have a performing President, such a person had better visit a psychologist and if it persists, visit a psychiatrist. For the 3 years that President Goodluck Jonathan has piloted the affairs of this country, he has displayed governance orchestrated by drunkenness and if he deems it fit to go to court over this statement, he is very free. But let him be reminded that no right thinking person will appear before the courts in Nigeria; not me.
His mantra of transformation agenda has turned to ‘traumatization’ agenda. This is a man who rode on the goodwill of Nigerians, not minding that we hated and still bitterly hate the PDP, we gave him our votes willingly like a virgin who has been brainwashed by the deceptive words of his lover and after the painful first time experience left to clean up the blood alone. President Jonathan has raped our collective intelligence and treasury, enjoying the ride and ecstasy alone while we never moaned or screamed as his lovers. Yes, he rode us like a beast while massaging us with sweeter words and promises. Finally he has dumped us!
We have turned to the masturbation of our brains to pleasure selves in order to forget the pains inflicted on us; consoling ourselves that if he doesn’t treat us well as we deserve, we will give ourselves treat, which we have continuously done. We agree that it is all deceit of our individual selves.
Walking like a frail man who knows no evil, with words so sweet to deceive even the strongest of minds, he bamboozled us with ‘I had no shoes” and we fell for it; unknown to us he had over 400 piece of shoes as a deputy governor. We forgot that he was held other positions that had empowered him, but yet we followed him blindly like a lamb led to the slaughter and he has truly slaughtered us.
The realization is not too late that we voted for a drunk who presides after taking shots of whisky or any brand that gets to the table first. If he is not a drunk, how do we explain his actions so far by becoming a terrorist to Journalists, taking them to court for exposing his memo to clamp down on opposition parties? While the case is still in court, he issues more threat of suing another media for daring to publish that he took shots of ‘ogogoro’ during his birthday celebration.
No one gives credit to Obasanjo and former leaders for all the evils they committed against Nigerian, neither have we told them, ‘well done for looting our national treasury”, thus using them to judge President Jonathan’s performance is foolery on anyone’s part. This is what makes some ethnic bigots to threaten fire and hell should GEJ not win 2015 election, simply because he comes from a region that is regarded as the ‘golden geese that lays the golden egg’, as if any of them planted or stored the oil in the land. Our carelessness as a people has given guts to ethnic morons to always scream blue murder when Jonathan is accused of corruption, ranting that he be left alone, ‘after all OBJ did worse. So what! Has OBJ become a standard for retrogression or has IBB become a yardstick to measuring who takes the plaque for Nigeria most corrupt leader. Is Nigeria a country that every ethnic leader who gets to the throne must rape silly?
Only drunk presidents are intimidated by his ministers, fearful of getting them sacked despite mountains of corruption leveled against them by the press and civil society, simply because they funded the rigged election that brought him to power. Only leaders who are always drunk allow ministers like Onyebuchi Chukwu to still remain in the saddle as health minister when it is glaring that he’s not fit for such a job. One would have thought that after the sack of Ruqayat as minister of education as a result of our calls, and replacing her with his buddy who is a thug, Nyesom Wike, the lingering ASUU crisis would have been resolved, but hell no; it gets worse. Here is a leader who has never owned up to his failure; always putting the blame on people and past leaders, which is a hallmark of drunkards. If you cannot stand the heat of the kitchen, get out.
Our drunken President has now mandated his puppet Vice Chancellors to force our erudite professors and lecturers to resume academic lectures or lose their positions. What arrant decree from a civilian president who has successfully metamorphosed into an emperor with title as Emperor Goodluck Jonathan Bulldozer. Does he think we live in the time of the military that his drafting of soldiers to the campuses will cause the lecturers to be frightened and resume? The military regime did worse than this in the popular ‘Ali must go’ and Ali did go. Jonathan should stop beating the war drum that will consume him and set the nation ablaze, for when it begins; not even the safety of Aso Rock can secure him. Only drunken Presidents dare the academia in their country for that begins the downfall of their regime, hence most leaders avoid them like plagues, giving them their dues with less confrontation.
Do we attach President’s Jonathan’s behavior to his study of zoology, haven mingled with animals that are lesser beings with shallow brains? I really don’t know where to place him. For the first time in the history of any country, opposition parties are always coming third in elections, in a new rigging style that the Goodluck administration have invented. For the first time in a country, opposition party leaders take to the street to protest the charade called election in Anambra States, and the President deploys all security forces to stop them. This is a protest where a former head of state and retired army general partook in! Hasn’t the president taken enough shots of ‘ogogoro’ for him to have the boldness to stop such constitutional process, using the apparatus of the state, which are funded by the generality of Nigerians?
For the very first time in our country, a President loses grip of his political structure in broad day light, prompting them to move to the opposition party, thereby making the President a minority leader; such a record he must be happy to have broken, as the world’s first president to come from a minority party. For crying out loud, how did we degenerate to this level of shame that we have a Rehoboam as a President; a drunk who never thinks before he acts; a leader who takes all his most sensitive decisions from corrupt imperialist women? Only drunks makes certificate forgers board members of a university and foremost corrupt ex governor board chairman of Pension commission, giving him access to loot the money of pensioners, which will be used in funding the president’s 2015 election.
Sometimes one wonders the army of deceivers who surrounds this once innocent president, telling him tales of Nigerians supporting his regime. One truly cannot tell where he gets the statement that Nigerians are asking him to contest for second tenure. Mr. President, please wake up from your slumber; no Nigerian has asked you to contest and if any has asked you, they are your ethnic group from South South, few South West people and minimum of South East voters and you can hear this straight; your support base is not up to two million voters.
Run for what? That we may continue in this hell that you and your PDP Governor’s forum Chairman, Godswill Akpabio has inflicted on us? Nigerians has not given up completely on you, for the race is still on. Most people are not good starters in a race and you are obviously one of such, hence the benefit of doubt that you may just end up well and become the most loved president in Nigeria’s history as you have always wished; that is if wishes were horses. Take less of alcohol and listen less to your corrupt henchmen, for in them lies your albatross.
We have given you a fresh start; solve all the lingering issues in the health and education sectors, do your best to alleviate the poverty level of Nigerians, read and listen to critical reports about you for that is where you will get the true pictures of happenings in Nigeria, not from your 419 aides. We hope to see you at the top.
These little things matter…
Fejiro Oliver, a Journalist can be reached on and +2348026797588 (sms only please). Follow on twitter  @fejirooliver86 and Facebook  fejirooliver86. Like our Facebook page – secretsreporters

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  1. This is a adverse publicity as a result of stupidity. As far as i'm concerned, GEJ has made the best president so far in this nation, Nigeria. This publicity does not even have a specific point, and i believe it is as a result of jealousy.

  2. the writer of this piece and his entire family are fool, u will never be respectd even wen u look for public position

  3. Fejiro or whatever you call yourself, for disregarding a man like GEJ with such and uncomplimentary update, you have proven to be a swine. Believe me, you won't go far!

  4. I don't think you know the journalist who wrote this? He is already famous for investigating and exposing many hidden things in the country. Give him a break for Jonathan is a failure. If Fejiro writes bad against APC now you people will praise but now that he has spoken the truth, you are angry. Drunk people

    • Fejiro is this u?? So u post under anonymous too?? Pls I dnt knw what Mr pres has done to u, free him! He is better than the likes of OBJ, ATIKU, TINUBU BUHARI etc. He is not up to expectation but he is the best so far. Stop cursing him out and learn to do constructive journalism.

  5. I love my country more than GEJ,PDP,APC,APGA,BUHARI and whatever demagogue you guys have put up for yourselves.This story has no effect on our economy,if he was drunk in public maybe(assuming he was) but in his private personal time he can smoke drink and smoke crack for all I care so long he does his job. So it is each to his own opinion,attacking,swearing and cursing your countryman over someone who probably doesn't know or care about you is foolish and bigotry of the highest order.Get a life!

  6. As far as I'm concerned, u didn't speak my mind. GEJ all the way! U are d drunkard.

  7. I condemned this write-up in it totality,give respect to whom respect is due 4 God sake he is d president of this nation and it is an insult to the entire nation and its international communities for calling a president a drunker.remember no one gets to a position of authority without God's affirmation so I call for a redress.constructive critcism aids adjustment n change n not a distructive criticism.I support a fight against coruption bt not this one.if this continue we re distroying our nation not the president.the battle is too much for him alone lets support n encourage him,that is the way forward

  8. Stupid and idiotic write up l have ever read. Go get a life. Yeye Agbero insulting my president. If you hate him, keep it to yourself. I passionatly admire him. May God bless Mr President and may the good Lord give him the courage and the wisdom he needs to lead the country.

  9. Jonathan folks,the opponents of this piece are as foolish and dumb as their president. Shame on any south-south person who blindly for the sake of ethnicity praises the failures and woeful abominable performance of the dumbest president ever and the worst thieve silently looting our wealth. Im a yoruba person who abhores obj because God has severally put him there to transform Nigeria yet he cannot even transform abeokuta. Let jolathan steal all the present and future money of Nigeria to want to rig 2015, he will fail and fail woefully just as he has done as a president


  10. I passionately say a big thank u to d person who wrote dis text cos of figurative explanation of wat is happening here in nigeria. However, been a drunkard is an xcuse for a failure. honestly, its not only bro Jona dat has been raping us, it begins wif obj not mentioning d hoodlums called miltary. d person dat says is God dat put Jona dere shud go back to bible where God told isrealite dat he will ALLOW a wicked man to rule dem cos dey av demanded for king instead of waiting on him. so wat i c is dat until we call her God wif one voice without religious or ethnic bias to request for God to giv us good leaders, i ges we will never get it ryt.

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